Ah-ha Moments Recently... (from a Christian's perspective)

1. Prayers & grace- I have always thought that if I wanted something to be improved in my relationship with my boyfriend, I need to tell him and we can work together at it and that would be enough. But, actually, I had missed the second part of it, all along. I recently realized not only do I need to pray for him, I, too, need to pray for God's grace in my ability to accept him for who he is. 
2. Spiritual Autonomy - In order for a couple to grow in Christ together when the two individual start dating, the two individuals need to have their own relationship and walk with Christ first. This is spiritual autonomy, he/she has his/her own walk with the Lord on a regular basis regardless of what's happening in their life. Spiritual autonomy prevents one person from relying on the other half to take the lead or motivate us in our spiritual walk. 
3. Marriage - Somewhere along the way, my boyfriend and I got sucked into thinking that we should get married in about 2 years time. That would be when we would be financially able for the wedding and mortgage. And in another 2 years after that, we should be ready to have kids due to our biological clocks ticking. We went along with society's thinking and our parent's pressure, but I have come to realize that if him and I aren't able to grow spiritually together and deepen our foundation in Christ in the next 2 years, we would unlikely be ready for marriage. I fear nothing more than to have kids one day and not have our spiritual foundation to fall back on should any big storm come our way or not be good examples to our kids in the way that the Lord wants us to be because we didn't spend the time to cultivate that growth when we were younger and had more time to do so.
4.  Confrontation & accountability - if someone has lied or wrong you, it is important to confront and let them and hold them accountable for what they have done. This by no means to lash out in anger and confront them with what they've done, but to confront someone with a calm heart and be articulate enough to hold them accountable for what they've done. This is an art and skill that is so essential and challenging - a skill that I am still working on. 

事情已经过了那么多久了。我以为如果我努力生活。。。不想你。。。就可以忘记你。 今天晚上当跟一个朋友讲倒以前的感情事，我发现我心理还很难过。。还很想念你。 你应该快结婚吧。我们永远都不会有可能。我不应该想太多。让上帝安排一切吧。